Darkness has descended upon the Perkins' house the past three days. We've been battling something ever since mid-December. The boys had been on antibiotics for 20 days and Lynn had been through a round herself. I had been spared, until Monday when it hit hard. Monday night was cold sweats and incredible body aches. I slept none-which I'm used to doing, but on my own terms. Tuesday afternoon rolls around and Lynn starts feeling it. By that night she is throwing up and feel worse than I had. Sometime in the night she handed me a knife and asked me to "Just end it! Stop the Pain! I can't go on!" Well-not really but she did think about death alot.
So, I've stayed home the past three days taking care of the kids, whom fortunately have been spared. Normally I'd be excited about taking three days off to stay home with the kids, BUT, I have this massive electric death killing storm over my head. This all happens when I finally get my a date that will work with all five of my PhD committee members for a defense date. Yes, MARCH 27th is when my PhD will officially be over. Anyways, I can't afford to take time off. I need to save my vacation days for my defense. Plus, all my spare time needs to be spent actually writing m PhD-except for blogging of course. I've never felt stress and guilt pull on me so hard. I don't know how the single parent does it. I felt guilty for not really giving the boys my full and attention and stressed because I have this Defense looming over me and I should be working on it. It didn't help to know that I was actually blessed to be in this situation where I could take time off work, take care of the kids, and still be pursuing a PhD.
Now the cloud has lifted some knowing that I am returning to work tomorrow. My manager has mentioned before that the time I take to defend my PhD in Atlanta will not count as vacation. I need to verify this. I also know that my timing is not Gods timing. This will work out. It just seems that He always brings some big event at the last minute.
Posted by andyp at January 26, 2007 12:54 AM | TrackBackJerry and I will continue to pray for you guys! I'm putting March 27th on my calendar to pray for a joyous conclusion of all your hard labor. I'm sure you divided your time just right between sick kids, sick wife and PHd. You're well trained in prioritizing. The very fact that you feel guilty probably means you don't need to be. I'm glad you're coming down the home stretch. We love you and we're praying for you every day.
Posted by: cindy at January 26, 2007 10:01 AMOh man, we've had the constant almost sinus infection plague. Horrible. It feels like time stands still while you're ill. I'm praying for you guys and that the time will balance out and that you will get soooo much done before March 27. I'll be praying that you finish it all before March 27th. I mean it is right before Joel's 30th :). Be blessed and have faith! We love you guys!